Listening to this song brought back feelings that you get when you’re deeply in love with someone. And I’m not even actually in love right now ffs that’s how good this song is.
This breaks my heart everytime I see it, and I think that it always will.
You can see on the shift on Katy’s face that she didn’t like the way he touched her but she couldn’t react ‘cause she has to be nice towards Riff Raff. She was dancing happily and the way her face fell and she just tried to smile and she suddenly kept silent breaks my heart.
Just because Katy often poses seductively etc etc on her shoots doesn’t mean that you could be fucking rude towards her. She has feelings too.
Not a fan of Gaga but this one’s amazing. Her strongest one in Artpop, in my opinion. My favorite line is “I don’t speak German but I try” because I feel like there was a lot of vulnerability that Gaga decided to expose on those words idk tho
My mom was brought to the hospital today and I’m left alone at home. My brother went to my grandma’s and I’m rereading the Harry Potter series after 7 years! (I don’t know how I lasted this long without rereading it either.)
I feel like I’m on 4th grade again! I miss the feeling that you get when you read Harry Potter for the first time. It sucks that I won’t feel that way again. Unless I get amnesia, I guess.
A few weeks ago, I posted on my blog an essay I wrote for my communication skills class. (Here’s the link if you want to read it.)
My professor returned the grading sheet last Friday for the said essay and to my surprise, I realized that I passed the first draft that I wrote, instead of the one I posted here.
The essay that I passed by mistake was less positive and gave more information than what I intended to, compared to the one that I was supposed to pass. Here’s the said essay:
I’m going to be honest with you. I tried to kill myself last summer. I’m not saying this just to gain your sympathy, or to catch your attention. I decided to talk about this because it seems relevant. Just like Nick Vujicic, I felt like I wasn’t enough.
Have you ever felt like you’re not enough? I have. We humans are always like that. We are often not contented with what we have. We always want something else. We often focus on the things that we lack, instead of being thankful for the things that we have. In the midst of all the blessings that we get, we humans have the knack of always finding something to complain about. When we focus entirely on the things that we don’t have, or on the aspects of our lives that we don’t like, we’re just pushing ourselves to the lips of our own graves.
There’s this guy, Nick Vujicic, that I saw on a blogging site last summer. He caught my attention because he had no arms and limbs but he was brave enough to throw himself off the table that he was sitting on. He was brave enough to put himself in front of millions of people just so he could talk about the problems that he went through. I felt a connection with him, because just like me, he once felt like he wasn’t enough. Just like me, he wanted to die because he thought he wasn’t enough.
Come to think of it, my problems are god damn petty compared to his. I thought I had no reasons to stay and live. And Nick? He had no arms and legs.
Whenever I look back on that summer – that god damn lonely summer that I spent moping around and feeling sorry for myself, I feel like kicking myself for wanting to throw away a life that a lot of people would kill for. I could not see how good I had it, because I kept on focusing on the things that I lost – not on the things that I might gain if I keep on moving forward.
I was sad because I didn’t have the motivation to continue this course, while other people had no money to even go to college. I was sad because I lost communication with most of my high school friends, when other people couldn’t even afford to go to high school, let alone finish elementary. I feel embarrassed telling you this because I sound like a selfish bastard, but I swear everything will make sense later.
Anyway, Nick Vujicic made me realize that there is so much to live for. He made me realize that you can live without the things you thought you needed. Sometimes, the things that you want the most are actually the things that you’re better off without.
See? It was too whiny and had too much information even for me, the writer of the essay. I decided that it was too negative and I wrote a new one. But in the process of printing the essays out, I think I printed both the new and the old ones and passed the old one by mistake.
My professor returned the essay last Friday and I noticed that the final line was highlighted. Sometimes, the things that you want the most are actually the things that you’re better off without.
She even wrote a note for me. She said “You can write, Mr. Ephraim. Keep it up!”
It feels great when people notice the effort you put in on your works, doesn’t it? But it feels better when you see people reacting positively on something you were anxious to let them see. :)
An essay about overcoming hopelessnes that I wrote for my communication skills class
Hope. Four letters, one syllable. A simple word that rolls out of your tongue as soon as you pronounce it. As simple as it may seem, hope makes a huge difference to a person who feels like ending his life.
Hope comes in different shapes and sizes. Your younger sibling’s smile, a baby’s hand grasping your finger, a new pair of shoes left by your mom on your bed as a surprise. Hope.
Have you ever felt so hopeless? Like nothing you do never comes out right. Like everything you do never turn out the way you want it to. We humans are always like that. We are often not contented with what we have. We always want something else. We often focus on the things that we lack, instead of being thankful for the things that we have. In the midst of all the blessings that we get, we humans have the knack of always finding something to complain about. When we focus entirely on the things that we don’t have, or on the aspects of our lives that we don’t like, we’re just pushing ourselves to the lips of our own graves. When we never feel enough, that’s when we lose hope. That’s when we start dying.
I wanted to die a few summers ago. Just like Nick Vujicic, that guy who had no arms and legs, I felt hopeless. I felt like I wasn’t enough. Just like I said a few moments ago, we humans have the knack of pointing out what’s missing in our lives instead of being grateful of what we have. I wanted to die because I didn’t have the motivation to continue this course, while other people had no money to even go to college. I was sad because I lost communication with most of the people I know from high school, when other people couldn’t even afford to go to high school, let alone finish elementary. I felt hopeless and I could not see anything worth living for, and I wanted to curl under my bed and die. I won’t delve too much on the details of that summer, but by God’s grace, I took a step back and saw how my problems looked like from a distance. My problems, despite how heavy they seemed, were petty compared to other people’s problems. By God’s grace, I saw how good my life was. Nag-iinarte lang pala ako. I took a deep breath and decided to stay.
If Nick, a guy without arms and legs, could feel whole and complete, then why can’t I? Why shouldn’t I? Nick had no limbs, but he had that power to move people with his words. He was physically incomplete, pero yung spirit nya sobrang macho. Nick made me realize that you can live without the things you thought you needed.
In this life, there is always something to be sad about. Something or someone to be insecure of. Someone who could write essays better than you could, someone who could paint better than you could, someone who has the longest legs that you dream of. There is always something in this world to make you feel bad about yourself. But why should we focus on that? Why should we let ourselves drown on the strong waves of sadness? We are as indestructible as we believe ourselves to be, according to one of my favourite books. Sadness is survivable. There is always hope. As I’ve said, hope comes in many shapes and sizes. You just have to let it in.
Hope. Four letters, one syllable, but it makes all the difference.
Last June 12th, I decided to watch Maleficent alone. I don’t like watching movies that I like with other people, idk idk. Maybe it’s because I don’t want them to see how I’d react on feels-inducing scenes. Lol remember when I watched Les Mis alone, too?
I know I have hideous hands lol I just liked how the background looks like! Haha!
My neighbors have great flora to take pictures of but I don’t even know them so I’d just have to buy my own plants. :( Btw I’m thinking of buying a pot of roses hehe and some daisy seeds too!!
not so hidden bra lol
ANYWAY back to Maleficent…
I loved it dajhsfgajsdh I’ve been waiting for it ever since I saw sneak peeks of it on Twitter. I remember seeing a photo of Angelina Jolie with her horns and she was wearing brown clothes lol and it was love at first sight.
I haven’t seen Sleeping Beauty (lol loser Ephraim) because Maleficent creeped me out when I was a kid. Damn, she had green skin and she likes to cackle - she reminded me of The Wicked Witch of The West, whom I used to be terrified of after watching The Wizard of Oz for the first time when I was 4.
Back when I was a kid, I didn’t get why the evil fairy godmother cursed Aurora just because she wasn’t invited to the christening. Lol I thought she needed anger management sessions. But after seeing Maleficent, damn… Just damn.
I loved Maleficent’s story, it reminded me that true love isn’t just for couples. But I’m going to justify the stuff that she did to the king, okay. I would’ve done the same things she did if I were on her shoes, I swear. But just like her, I’d probably be nice towards the end, too. Lmao! The ending was a bit predictable, though.
Btw this was a picture that I took on the cinema lol one of my favorite scenes! The *feels* slapped me in the face! I love how she decided to free herself from her past.
And lol this was what I wore. All black errthang because I’m always ready for my funeral lol
I am so in love with my Zox :(
Remember when I was in 3rd grade and #Tangled was just a tentative concept? I was damn excited for it even then. Sometimes, I just find it hard to believe that it’s been out for almost 4 years, I think, and it still hasn’t gotten old for me. I don’t think it ever will! It’s just so worth the wait, I swear.
I got this Starry Night Zox from someone I never thought I’d be friends with - she’s just too cool yknow. :(
She gave this to me for no apparent reason u guys!!! I’m blessed af